Auditions Premiere

So it begins AGAIN! At the end of every season, I declare that I am not a huge American Idol fan. In 2009, my great friend Jen got tickets for us to see the AI concert with the howler monkey and Anoooooop at the Verizon Center in DC. I responded, when seeing the tickets, with less than enthusiasm. (Jen was very disappointed with me). We went to the concert and had the best time ever though I believe that has more to do with Jen than it does with the immense talent of the AI crew. Still, my interest in the karaoke show wanes once the top ten is declared. Weird, isn't it, that that is when I start to write about it? Hmm.

In any case, I am watching the season premiere of the show tonight. I don't even know how many seasons it has been. As soon as I see Simon, I am yanked back in. Why do I have such a thing for him? And now he is leaving after the season? What to do?

Victoria Beckham is a guest judge and I feel like she and I could be great friends. Leave me alone. I live happily in my own little world. I call it Bugville. It's major! I thought Ellen was supposed to host. I am not thrilled about this. She hosted So You Think You Can Dance and was not funny or even very interesting to me. I am hoping she proves me wrong and is wildly entertaining.

This one girl auditioned because she totally nails the AI Wii game. I blame Simon for her thinking that her video game success will relate to show success because in an interview about the game, he claims that the game will help. I hope lots of people audition because the Simon avatar was all "1,000,000 percent YES!" on the game.

I also think that Proactiv should sponsor this show. (The guy who made me think this likes Chris Brown because he believes that he touches young people all around the world. Touches. more like punches. What? Too soon?) He wants to touch America. I think Chris Hansen will be speaking to him in a few years.

What the heck is that Swatch that Randy is wearing? Are the 80's really really really making a comeback? If so, there are certain things I would like to ban from this renaissance. Pegged pants. LA Gear shoes (though they may be more 90's. I still don't want to see them ever again). Frosty pink lipstick. MC Hammer. And grown men with Swatches. No. To be fair, I had two and I wore them at the same time on the same wrist. Awesome.

Andrew is awesome. He looks like a serial killer and acts like one, too. (Save for the missing arm cast, van, and sofa that he needs helping loading into aforementioned van). He is upset about waiting. This whole industry is a hurry up and wait industry. Kara said he needs a spanking. I thought she did not like him and now she is threatening him with a good time? She confuses me sometimes.

(Ooh, Simon smirked. I LOVE YOUUUU.)